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Nurturing Self-Control: A Guide to Supporting ADHD Children in Managing Impulsive Behaviour

Updated: Sep 10, 2023

Impulsive behaviour is a common trait in ADHD children, but it's crucial for their development to learn how to control it. Developing executive functions, such as emotional control and response inhibition, is essential for helping children manage their impulsive behaviour effectively. This comprehensive guide will explore strategies and tips to support children in acquiring these essential life skills.


Understanding Executive Functions


Executive functions refer to cognitive processes that enable individuals to plan, focus attention, remember instructions, and juggle multiple tasks successfully. Two crucial executive functions related to impulsive behaviour are emotional control and response inhibition.


1. Identifying Triggers


The first step in helping children control their impulsive behaviour is identifying the triggers that lead to impulsive actions. Recognising situations or stimuli that tend to provoke impulsive reactions is essential. These triggers can vary from child to child but may include open-ended play, watching TV with siblings, or other specific scenarios.


2. Establishing Rules and Strategies


Once you've identified the triggers, working with your child to establish rules and strategies for managing impulsive behaviour in those situations is essential. The rules should focus on what your child can do to control impulses rather than simply prohibiting certain actions. Encourage your child to devise several alternative actions they can take instead of the impulsive response.


3. Signalling Impending Impulsivity


Communication is key in helping children gain control over their impulses. Discuss with your child how you can signal to them that they are on the verge of losing control. Simple and discrete visual signals, such as a hand motion, can effectively alert your child to the problem without drawing unnecessary attention.


4. Practice the Procedure


To ensure your child understands and can implement the agreed-upon coping strategies, practice is crucial. Create scenarios that mimic real-life situations, such as conflicts with friends or siblings. Role-play these situations, and guide your child in using the strategies they've agreed upon. Model appropriate responses and encourage them to follow suit.


5. Consistent Practice


Consistency is key to reinforcing new behaviours. Continue practicing these procedures daily or several times weekly for a few weeks. Repetition helps children internalise the strategies and make them a part of their problem-solving toolkit.


6. Reminding and Reinforcing


When your child is ready to apply these procedures in real-life situations, provide reminders before the trigger situations are likely to occur. A gentle reminder like "Remember the plan" or "Remember what we talked about" can help prepare your child for the challenge ahead.


7. Post-Situation Review


After the trigger situation has occurred and your child has attempted to use the coping strategies, take time to review how the procedure worked. You can create a scale (e.g., from 1 to 5) that both you and your child can use to assess how well it went. This provides an opportunity for feedback and improvement.


Adjustments and Additional Tips:


- Reward System: Consider implementing a reward system to reinforce your child's efforts in managing impulsive behaviour. Rewards can be simple, such as stickers or extra playtime.


- One Trigger at a Time: Tackle one trigger situation at a time to avoid overwhelming your child with multiple scenarios to manage.


- Praise and Positive Reinforcement: Praise your child when using self-control and the agreed-upon strategies. Positive reinforcement can go a long way in encouraging continued progress.


- Worksheet: Here is a simple worksheet you can use with your child to note ideas and progress:


- Trigger Situation: ___________________

- Rule/Strategy: _______________________

- Signal: _____________________________

- Practice Scenarios: ___________________

- Review (Scale 1-5): _________________



Teaching children how to control their impulsive behaviour is a valuable life skill that can positively impact their personal and social development. Parents and caregivers can help children develop the executive functions necessary for self-control and emotional regulation by addressing triggers, establishing rules and strategies, practising, and providing ongoing support. Remember that patience, consistency, and open communication are key elements in this process, fostering a strong foundation for your child's future success.


Discover strategies and tips to mange impulsive behaviour in your ADHD kids
Helping ADHD kids manage their impulsive behaviour

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